Monday, May 14, 2007
One fine Summer Love“Dear Blas,
Do the same thing, never again. That one fine summer love was the only thing we had ever shared in our existence, and if I am lucky enough, you will accept the fact that I am made for you and so as you are to me, I am your soulmate, I am the girl who’s loving you since the past lifetime, I was the one for you, come back to me now! And make me whole once again, I love you! We should be together again! We would be bigger than anything! We could have been so perfect! I should be the one whom you’re locking in your arms… not shasha, not adi but me, Thonie…”
Changes are constant in our lives, and chances might not come back again, the frailty of human existence… isn’t it sweet?
Oh yeah for sure… As I was listening to my pod, the songs first of summer, where’d you go, 241 (my favorite song), and scars reminds me of a person,,, oh that guy…. His name is Blas, he is strong, smart and affectionate
It was then last summer when I’ve met a man named Blas who made me happy, alleviated my pain and made sense when none of the pieces fit. Way back then before he came in, my life was never happy, I haven’t had any successful relationship, or sometimes it’s not congruent, because the odd thing is that when somebody loves you, it turns out that you’re not feeling the same, and so I looked for somebody, a prince charming who will see through me and accept my imperfections, who will treat me as her Queen… and that summer, I never failed to find a person like that… Blas… everything between us is so perfect, no wars, no shouts and no delusions.
Oh how I loved him, but then again, it’s bound to be a heartbreak situation, especially if you are not OFFICIALLY ATTACHED to that person. I felt so betrayed and cheated by my own thoughts of making him stay with me forever, marrying him, having kids and raising a family and so as the fantasy goes on without me expecting that things could fall for some unfortunate instances…
COULD I BE SORRY? Perhaps yes, because I can never find another like him, and a soulmate passes in your life only once so seize that moment and never let it go, hold on still even if this take a lifetime of suffering…
Or perhaps No, I shouldn’t be sorry for everything happened, it’s written on our fate. . And on the first place, I’m not the one who broke him; I’m not the one who should feel sorry and be a loser! It should be him! I didn’t do anything wrong! All I did was to make him happy, loved him the best way that I can and surrendered my self completely!
But at least we had a moment before he bid farewell! Oh no! It is undefined,,, it’s not enough … if only I had the power to turn back the hands of time, I will go back to the day when I met Blas and say “NO! you cannot enter my life”, but it can’t be because I haven’t regret anything that came between us, he is such a wonderful thing that ever hit my life, What we had is rare, it’s too beautiful to just throw it away…
It will preserve in my memory, be tattooed in my heart and stick to my soul forever, for my heart will always have a space for him…
Hahaha! My hopes are all disillusionment, I must stop, I can never ever have him again,,, but I’am sorry if I can’t stop it until now…
I’m sorry Blas, I just missed you, and I’m sick and tired of waiting for my rocket to come. When are you coming back home again to make me and walk with me again along the grills and the shrubs, hold my hand and talk things that makes us laugh and cry… I wish someday that we will reunite and return.
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